There is a creed as old as time. Before the Renaissance, earlier than man has taken to the seas, even predating the construction of the great pyramids—mankind has never been without this hallowed canon. Belief has it that tablets containing the venerable words were brought across the universe to us from the ancients. Their consummate wisdom was left to guide mankind onward to a new hope, a better world. We know this much to be true: as long as there have been dads, there has been the creed.
No, not that creed.
No, not that creed either.
No … stop it. Now where was I? Oh yes …
Unearthed from caves at the end of the world, the stone tablets found there revealed the creed. Think of it as one of the Parenting Articles of Faith. Dads have been reciting it ever since. It has always been. It always will be. Dads will hand it down from generation to generation, until the end of time.
The Daddy Creed
I am not a drum.
I am not a jungle gym.
I am not a dog, nor a cat.
I am not a cash machine.
I am not a food dispenser.
I am not an attack dummy.
I am not the Mayor of Television.
I am not a target. (No, not that kind of Target.)
I am not the maid (but sometimes I do windows).
I am not a race car driver, who goes fast, fast, FAST!
I make food, but I am not a Top Chef, nor even a bottom chef.
I am not a horse, to be ridden around the living room all willy-nilly. But sometimes, if you’re lucky, you may catch a ride.
I will play outside in the backyard, even though it is 100+ degrees out today.
If you ask, I will turn on Dora the Explorer, and not sigh or shout anything out loud.
I will say it’s OK if we watch your shows, instead of football, on today or any other day.
I will turn the radio down in the car, and stop singing when you ask, even though I was rocking pretty good just then.
I will remind myself that being new to this world, you need to test your boundaries and try new things, even though that scares me.
I will make time, every day, to stop and reflect on what a wonder you are to behold.
I will remind myself that you are amazing and beautiful and I am lucky to be here with you.
I will cherish these days with you so little and new, and always have this time in my memory, time that will one day leave us … as all things do.
So there you have it. The secret is out. Now everyone knows the secret creed that has been handed down through time immemorial. May it help you through your days. But of course, there are other chants and recitations parents lean on during the long days one cannot avoid.
What is your mantra? What helps you stop, get perspective, and sort things out?